Common Sense

I’m guessing (and this is just speculation since I’m not a lawyer) that holding your toddler hostage, having the police kick the door in and having Britney Spears strapped to a gurney with police riding in the ambulance and then being put under 72-hour “crazy watch” (my non-legal term) may mean that Britney Spears is […]

If you have a daughter under the age of 18, DO NOT DATE A MAN NAMED CHESTER!
Chester the Molestor, how hard is that to figure out? Oh, and if you have a daughter older than 18 who is hot, do not date a younger man with tattoos; he will end up banging her.
This is all […]

NBC has canceled its post-jail interview with Paris Hilton.
NBC has canceled their $1 million interview with Paris Hilton, most likely from the pressure of the entire world calling them ass clowns. No official reason was given, but NBC is backtracking and saying they never sealed the deal on the interview to begin with, so there […]

Apparently, NBC is going to pay Paris Hilton $1 million for her first after-jail interview.
Let me say that again. They are going to pay a billionaire hotel heiress $1 million to talk about her 23 days in jail. I don’t want to scare anyone, but I’m starting to understand why people just flip out, get […]

Apparently, people who want to vacation in the Western Hemisphere have found a backlog of passports being issued and vacations have been ruined.
The demand soared at the beginning of the year, as travelers sought to comply with a new rule requiring passports for all U.S. citizens flying within the Western Hemisphere.
And that demand has created […]

Or rather, to write on. From my Myspace:
IMPORTANT MESSAGE FOR RON PAUL SUPPORTERS
We all know public media is trying to ignore and pass over some of the important things this man has to say! Well here it is, the simplest way to get his name out there! I have a feeling that if the majority […]

Apparently, rehab isn’t what I think it is because people keep checking in and out and when they’re out they’re doing exactly what they went to rehab to stop doing.
This is what rehab did to Lindsay Lohan for fuck’s sake. But the Daily News says she’s headed to the Promises rehab facility, which I’ve […]

(Ed. note: Joe Weather advises me that this was edited after the fact with animal porn. In my own fantasy world where I  run the control room, I would have gone to YouTube and looked for videos of guys collecting elephant semen… wait, I already did that. Maybe I can get a job working for […]

And that is sooooo last decade. Why did we even elect a Democratic Senate anyway?
The Senate effectively killed a bid to allow consumers to buy their prescription medicines abroad Monday, requiring U.S. officials to certify the safety and effectiveness of such drugs.

Which is such bull. It’s the exact same pills only the governments in England, […]

I’m not entirely clear on how Sen. Dan Patrick’s bill requiring ultrasounds before a woman can get an abortion isn’t unconstitutional.
I’m no constitutional scholar, but when it comes to abortion rights and the Supreme Court, I’ve read up a little. Although, Roe hasn’t been overturned, the prevailing thought is that any restriction on abortion is […]