Common Sense

I’m reminded that Sailor Moon had never actually seen any of the Rambo movies until Space Monkey and I showed parts 1 and 2 to him. Of course, badass action and using a bow to blow shit up was very appealing to him. That’s what we call a “weekend” at Sailor Moon’s house.

But I wasn’t too enthused when I heard Stallone was making a fourth installment in the franchise. After all, the guy is 61. The only other old guy that is still trying to be an action star is Bruce Willis, and his fourth sequel in the Die Hard series was cartoonish at best and insulting at worst.

Stallone seems to have found a formula that works, though: First, add a little HGH, write a script where the only answer to the problem is unadulterated violence, then commence to blowing motherfuckers up.

I’ll be adding my five dollars to the opening weekend stats sometime soon because I’ve read enough to know that this is the kind of movie I expect when I see the title Rambo. I don’t want a whole lot story or plot. I want unambiguous bad guys. I want really big guns. I want to see people blown in half… literally. According to Devin, it’s gonna take a lot to top the carnage candy in this film. You hear that makers of the Saw movies?! You have some big combat boots to fill in the sequel that I haven’t heard announced but undoubtedly will be in my local theaters in October.

I’m reminded that Sailor Moon had never actually seen any of the Rambo movies until Space Monkey and I showed parts 1 and 2 to him. Of course, badass action and using a bow to blow shit up was very appealing to him. That’s what we call a “weekend” at Sailor Moon’s house.

But I wasn’t too enthused when I heard Stallone was making a fourth installment in the franchise. After all, the guy is 61. The only other old guy that is still trying to be an action star is Bruce Willis, and his fourth sequel in the Die Hard series was cartoonish at best and insulting at worst.

Stallone seems to have found a formula that works, though: First, add a little HGH, write a script where the only answer to the problem is unadulterated violence, then commence to blowing motherfuckers up.

I’ll be adding my five dollars to the opening weekend stats sometime soon because I’ve read enough to know that this is the kind of movie I expect when I see the title Rambo. I don’t want a whole lot story or plot. I want unambiguous bad guys. I want really big guns. I want to see people blown in half… literally. According to Devin, it’s gonna take a lot to top the carnage candy in this film. You hear that makers of the Saw movies?! You have some big combat boots to fill in the sequel that I haven’t heard announced but undoubtedly will be in my local theaters in October.