Common Sense

Slate seems to be taking the approach that sex sells because they have several stories today about sex.

Probably the creepiest is William Saletan discussing lowering the age of consent. He breaks consent down between three distinct areas: biological readiness which is around 12, age of cognitive readiness which is around 16 and age of emotional readiness which is around 25 (Ed. note: I can tell you from personal experience that there is no age at which women are emotionally ready for anything, so I dispute his entire last point).

Age of consent laws are a mess here in the States. In Texas, it’s 17. In others, it’s 18. In some, a high school senior can end up as a registered sex offender for dating a sophomore. I’m with him on a clean, universal age of consent that we can all agree on.

In some European countries, they’ve just dropped it to 14-17. Just eliminate the whole underage thing with the start of puberty and call it quits. Some will say eww, but if you’ve seen that movie Thirteen (with Oscar-winner Holly Hunter and Vanessa Hudgens? Wow, now I know why she did those nude pictures. Wait, she plays the goody-two-shoes friend, not the bad girl. Now I’m just confused), you know that might not be a bad idea. Besides, I honestly can’t tell 12-year-olds from 18-year-olds anymore. They dress, look and act the exact same. That’s apparently because while the age of consent has gone up, biology has made the age at which puberty begins go down.

For what reason Darwin only knows.

But that creates the quandary of girls who look of age and whose hormones tell them it is time to have sex being completely off limits while simultaneously they try to be on limits, as anyone who has ever been to a high school party knows when the junior high cheerleading squad shows up.

So should we reconsider age of consent? Yeah, probably, but Saletan’s explanations as to what constitutes a young guy mistaken by biology and a  creepy old pedophile would be hard to codify into law, so I’ll just say it should be… 16. If she has a license and can drive to your house for a quickie, it should be legal.

Of course, that reminds me of a saying we have here in Texas

17’s legal, 16 with her parents’ permission, 15 if her dad’s in the room.

Poetry, isn’t it? Now let’s never let Saletan speak of this again.

Meghan O’Rourke tackles that old favorite, the HPV vaccine Gardasil. Does a cancer vaccine make you slutty? Since I went too long (perhaps, way too long) on the age of consent, the short answer is ‘No, and anyone who tells you that saving your little girl from cervical cancer is tantamount to making her a whore is just an idiot and probably doesn’t have the cognitive functions or the best interests of their own child in mind, and therefore should not be a parent.’

Or, even shorter, ‘Make sure that your religious wingnuts are spade and neutered.’

There is another story about old-people sex, but I’m not going there, man. The Vicodin is going to have my liver shot by the time I’m 40 anyway, so nursing-home sex isn’t even something I’m going to need to contemplate.

Slate seems to be taking the approach that sex sells because they have several stories today about sex.

Probably the creepiest is William Saletan discussing lowering the age of consent. He breaks consent down between three distinct areas: biological readiness which is around 12, age of cognitive readiness which is around 16 and age of emotional readiness which is around 25 (Ed. note: I can tell you from personal experience that there is no age at which women are emotionally ready for anything, so I dispute his entire last point).

Age of consent laws are a mess here in the States. In Texas, it’s 17. In others, it’s 18. In some, a high school senior can end up as a registered sex offender for dating a sophomore. I’m with him on a clean, universal age of consent that we can all agree on.

In some European countries, they’ve just dropped it to 14-17. Just eliminate the whole underage thing with the start of puberty and call it quits. Some will say eww, but if you’ve seen that movie Thirteen (with Oscar-winner Holly Hunter and Vanessa Hudgens? Wow, now I know why she did those nude pictures. Wait, she plays the goody-two-shoes friend, not the bad girl. Now I’m just confused), you know that might not be a bad idea. Besides, I honestly can’t tell 12-year-olds from 18-year-olds anymore. They dress, look and act the exact same. That’s apparently because while the age of consent has gone up, biology has made the age at which puberty begins go down.

For what reason Darwin only knows.

But that creates the quandary of girls who look of age and whose hormones tell them it is time to have sex being completely off limits while simultaneously they try to be on limits, as anyone who has ever been to a high school party knows when the junior high cheerleading squad shows up.

So should we reconsider age of consent? Yeah, probably, but Saletan’s explanations as to what constitutes a young guy mistaken by biology and a  creepy old pedophile would be hard to codify into law, so I’ll just say it should be… 16. If she has a license and can drive to your house for a quickie, it should be legal.

Of course, that reminds me of a saying we have here in Texas

17’s legal, 16 with her parents’ permission, 15 if her dad’s in the room.

Poetry, isn’t it? Now let’s never let Saletan speak of this again.

Meghan O’Rourke tackles that old favorite, the HPV vaccine Gardasil. Does a cancer vaccine make you slutty? Since I went too long (perhaps, way too long) on the age of consent, the short answer is ‘No, and anyone who tells you that saving your little girl from cervical cancer is tantamount to making her a whore is just an idiot and probably doesn’t have the cognitive functions or the best interests of their own child in mind, and therefore should not be a parent.’

Or, even shorter, ‘Make sure that your religious wingnuts are spade and neutered.’

There is another story about old-people sex, but I’m not going there, man. The Vicodin is going to have my liver shot by the time I’m 40 anyway, so nursing-home sex isn’t even something I’m going to need to contemplate.