Common Sense

Apparently, NBC is going to pay Paris Hilton $1 million for her first after-jail interview.

Let me say that again. They are going to pay a billionaire hotel heiress $1 million to talk about her 23 days in jail. I don’t want to scare anyone, but I’m starting to understand why people just flip out, get extremely paranoid, and then go one campus-wide shooting sprees.

NBC has agreed to pay Paris Hilton $1 million for her first after-jail interview which will appear on the “Today” show. Paris agreed to the interview, but said she’d only speak with Meredith Vieira because of “disparaging” remarks her co-host Matt Lauer made about her. ABC execs are pissed at the news because they were expecting Paris’ first interview to go to Barbara Walters.

I don’t get it. If you are already rich, people seem ready to pony up huge sums of cash to hear about your 23 days in the slammer where you cried and wrote letters with worse penmanship than my 9-year-old niece.

If you get a life term in prison for breaking your probation for smoking pot, The Today Show is not going to pay you a single penny to get your story. You’re lucky if that same judge finally orders your release after a couple of years and a lost bid at re-election.

How do you know if you are insane? I mean, I assume insane people don’t know that they are. Can you tell because everything about the world around you and everyone in it seems completely fucking insane themselves, or do you just have to rely on the invisible man in the sky they keep telling you is there judging you to sort things out.