Common Sense

For the first time in a long time, I actually feel good.

My Aunt Sis went with me to see Dr. Speckmiear, my general practicitioner, on Friday. I brought with my several medical journal articles on chronic opioid analgesic therapy and the success that’s been had with chronic pain sufferers.

I also had the WHO ladder for use of analgesics that showed that my level of pain usually required codeine, hydrocodone or oxycodone to deal with effectively.

I also told him how I had titrated off of Cymbalta because it had caused me to actually cry myself to sleep several times and gave me recurring dreams where I was standing naked in front of oncoming trains on the railroad tracks behind my house. He actually complimented me on titrating off instead of just quitting like many people would, which made me feel good.

He read my arguments, we talked about how I have no history of drug or alcohol abuse (other than socially drinking to excess with friends) and he agreed to give this a try in addition to my nerve block injections this week.

I think it also helped to tell him I’m was taking upwards of 14 extra strength Tylenol a day and had puked up something pink and green in the bushes at McAllister’s Deli the night before.

So, instead of the usual rationing out pain meds until I get depressed and suicidal, he wrote me a script for Lorcet 10/650 in a 60 pill quantity to be refilled 2 times. He also has me on clonazepam, which is doing wonders for getting me back to sleep on a regular basis. And, instead of Cymbalta, we’re trying Effexor. Ordinarily, you have to let the stuff accumulate in your system before it is effective, but my first 37.5mg pill, well, I haven’t tried amphetamines before, but I imagine that is how they make you feel. I actually went to sleep with a smile on my face.

Later Friday night, Space Monkey and I went to play pool. I had one shot of whiskey and one beer (like Jack Nicholson in The Departed) and that was it. We played for more than an hour and I only needed half a pill to really deal with the pain. And I won two games!

Then we went to Two Minnies, spent a few dollar bills and I got a crush on a dancer named Jazzmyne.

Tonight, I felt so good that I actually went back to talk to my waitress friend Tracy. I actually count her as a friend now, her and the other waitress Sharon (long story) but i hope to see both of them as friends and maybe get coffee or something soon. Tracy might even get me the hook up with a new girlfriend !?

I can’t begin to tell you all how much better I’m feeling. For almost a year now, things I’ve tried have failed and failed again. Every medicine, every trip to physio just made my life more of a living hell. For the first time, I can see a silver lining and my heart is soaring because of it. It’s not the drugs, its actual happiness.

Oh, and my aunt was so impressed by my research into my condition and my treatment idea that she told me I really should have been a doctor. That made me feel good. She told me on the phone today that she likes spending time with me and I think I’ll take to Joe Muggs for a little coffee this afternoon.

The puppies are well. I’ve kept them fed and watered, bought them a new chew toy on my drive home tonight and Common Sense mom may be surprised to find that we have a new Swiffer Wet Jet and Swiffer sweeper to clean up their messes that I bought at Fred’s dollar store yesterday morning.

If this food feeling lasts, I might have even better news for you in the coming weeks. Thanks for being my loyal readers through all the bullshit and angst and good times.

Nate