Common Sense

Last night’s Katie Couric-debut included a sneak peek at the Vanity Fair cover photo of little Suri Cruise.

You cannot tell me that that is 4 1/2 month-old baby or that Tom and Katie are the real parents. That child is straight out of Central Casting. That much hair? Come on. She’s at least 6 months, if not 8-10.
Popular speculation was that there was no baby, but I stand by my theory that Suri Cruise is, in fact, the antichrist. As such, she was born with horns, a tail and hooved feet; not the sort of thing that makes the cover.

No, the scheme here is to convince the world that they have a normal child, then we won’t see her or Katie for quite some time. Not until everything is ready for the 1,000 years of darkness. Luckily, Baby Shiloh Nouvelle Jolie-Pitt is here to save all of us from evil.

Mark my words, people. The apocalypse is nigh.